Now, I know what everyone is thinking!! Why has it been so long, Guru!??! While I legally can't tell you the full story, I can tell you that I have been forbidden from posting Lost Spoilers... at the risk of DEATH!
But throughout time (get it, *time*??), many heroes have sacrificed their own well being for the betterment of others... and the GURU is no exception!
So, this past weekend, I put a call into my SSSS (super secret spoiler source), and asked him to divulge whatever he could about the final season of the greatest thing in earth's history, aka Lost. AND HE DID NOT DISAPPOINT.
*HERE IS YOUR FINAL WARNING-- WHAT IS LISTED BELOW MIGHT SPOIL THE ENTIRE SEASON FOR YOU!!!-- SCROLL TO THE END FOR SPOILER PHOTOGRAPHS!**
* The Polar Bears on the Island are Robots from Disney
* The Smoke Monster (aka Tony Siragusa) is still hungry, but he doesn't like pizza anymore
* He likes Filet Mignon with Gouda
* Jack decides to stop being lame and start using steroids so that he can fight the smoke monster
* But he still loses and is eaten... with Gouda
* Snitsky murders Doctor Freeze on the Black Rock and then builds the Frozen Wheel that Ben used to move the island.
* Snitsky killed Doctor Freeze with a big boot and then killed Doctor Freeze's baby with a chair shot to the skull
* Nikki and Paulo have a sex scene, but not with each other. Nikki gets with Rose and Paulo gets with Bernard.
* Roger Linus, the enigmatic Phil, and Stuart Radzinsky will form the Island's Holy Trinity (Seen Below)
OMG WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN!!!! TOMORROW, WE FIND OUTTTT!
